The Taco Plate

Yesterday was a hard day for me. I got a few pieces of bad news throughout the day, both of my girls came down with intense cold symptoms, and I just felt defeated overall. When I came up from a meeting in the studio, Sadie, covered in guacamole, yelled from her highchair, “Mommy!!” Lilah smiled and said, “Mommy’s home! Mommy, I’m watching Dory!” Their sweet greetings brought a smile to my face but my heart still felt burdened by the day. When they finished their dinner we sat on the couch and watched the rest of Finding Dory, but I didn’t really watch. My mind was elsewhere, oscillating between being anxious about my girls being sick and thinking about the heaviness of my day. When the movie ended we went up for bath time and then jammies and then books. I went through the motions, almost completely silent (which I’m pretty sure freaked Jacob out because he usually can’t get me to shut my mouth). But, he didn’t say anything, probably noticing that my brain wasn’t in the place to have a real conversation. Finally, as he finished reading the last page of “Hello Farm” (one of Sadie’s favorite books) I blurted out, “I feel so grumpy.” Instead of a snarky, “I noticed,” he half smiled. “Sorry bug. Want me to go get us dinner? What do you want? Rubios? In N Out?” He knows the way to my heart. I couldn’t really think about what I wanted and I actually didn’t even feel hungry so I just said, “Whatever you want is fine.”

I climbed up into Lilah’s loft bed, he gave her a kiss, and then left to get me my mystery dinner. Lilah and I read a few more books, turned off the lights, sang songs, and then prayed. We talked and laughed and I started to feel the weight lifted from my heart. I gave her a final goodnight kiss, promised her approximately 43 times that Daddy would, in fact, come kiss her when he got home, and then went downstairs. I grabbed my Bible study binder and began reading. The words in my study encouraged me and the weight that had begun to lighten as I snuggled with Lilah lifted even more. Jacob got home and I didn’t even look up because I was so captivated by the words I was reading. He went to the kitchen and returned with this: a platter of street tacos, rice, beans, salsa, pintos and cheese, a churro, and (the best part) mild sauce.

I laughed. “Did you get Rubios AND Taco Bell?” He smiled proudly, “Well I knew you would want the food from Rubios but the sauce from Taco Bell so I got you both.” My heart soared.

He loves me.

He loves me when I’m grumpy or tired or burdened. I had felt anxious and defeated but a little snuggle from my Lulu, truth from The Word, and Mild Sauce from my sweetheart lifted my spirits and reminded me of how much there is to be thankful for.

“Come to Me, all who are weary and heavy-laden, and I will give you rest.” Matthew 11:28

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